Life is like that...sometimes

Hi All,
Here I am back again with my second article. Please share your thoughts on the same.

“Life is like that”

This is the adage I have heard people mumbling when one loses out on their expectations. It is the final acceptance of the hard reality of a situation. Life is like that, sometimes. You wake up one morning and find yourself staring at yourself in the mirror that you haven't really looked at for quite some time and realized that, yes, real life has finally wedged on.
Life is full of surprises. It’s the way you want to take it, as one quotes, how you wish to look at a glass of half filled milk, as “half full” or “half empty”. So it’s just the perception with which one looks at life. Anyway, Life is like that, people change, times change, locations change, feelings change, partners change etc. Have you ever wished you could go back to a simpler time? I do quite often. I'd go back to the time when I was 10, when life was simple and the biggest problem was learning how to multiply 7x8. Why is it that as I grow older more and more 'must-haves' became part of my life? It would have been easy if I never grew up.

It was 7 AM on a Monday morning and woke up to feel cold, surprised!!!! Why do I feel cold in a summer season? Oops got the answer from my wet knickers, I did it again. It’s been ages since I had a dry night. Every night before sleep I tell myself not to Bed wet, and wake up just to realize, “No I did it again”. Here is the confused kid studying in 7th standard who is never good at studies or sports or personal relations and always low on confidence, a kid who never hesitates to lie and never had any values in life.

He had learnt an art of pretending and suppressing his weakness underneath and never bothered to address those. He gradually mastered lying and even went ahead to morph his marks cards. He managed to runaway from those whom he felt are stronger than him and he never liked some one insulting him.

Time just passed by with out much change.

"All that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel Mother." -- Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)

The thoughts I am going to share and dwell upon are best summarized by the quote above by Abraham Lincoln.
This is the time when I was in 10th standard and had been to a scouting camp for 3 days. For the first time detached from my mother, it was day of terror as I was never been appreciated and was only haunted for the whole day.

I realized the true value of my mother. Being far away from home, I was first haunted by emptiness. Absence of my family, especially, my mother and her never dying love and affection, had created the vacuum in my life.

After spending 3 days, I began to realize the fact that we never understand and recognize the real value of many things which can never be explained. For the first in my life I had 3 dry nights in a stretch and these three days made me to realize the reality of life.

After this realization, I made it a point to always express my gratitude each and every time I speak to her.

I felt that I need to change and I have to accept my weakness in order to change. I wanted to learn from the people around me and who better than my mom, who is a true leader herself and knows to fight the problems. She had a strong will and a person who always wished to dream big. The only goal I had at this point is to be appreciated by the people around me as I was always jealous of my brother who is a true all-rounder and wanted to match him in every aspect. I knew it was impossible as I was never keen on studies. Confusions all around I truly felt it would have been easier if I never grew up.

I started seeing life in a different perception and started thinking positively. This phase taught me much needed soft skills and gradually the jealousy had transformed to inspiration. I began to do good things and always ensure to be there for family and friends even though I was not called for. This gave me tremendous happiness as I started to feel that I am a value add to the people known to me. I always got the support I wanted from my mother as she knew that I am not good at studies.

Even the least work done for others awakens the power with in – Swami Vivekananda

I began to enjoy every moment of life as I was one of the responsible persons of the family and I had made several friends who are friends for life. As always studies was never on the priority list and it did not really matter as I was being appreciated by the people around me.

I gained enough trust of my parents and friends. Life was turned ON to rocking mode when I found my life partner in one of my friends. Entertainment, quarrels, emotions and feelings were all part of life. As we all know life is full of surprises and ups & downs make up a persons life.

Time passed by and changes were part of life. Studies were still on the same mode and it never seemed to be improved.

This time god had something else in the store and was true testing phase of my life. Done with one of the 8th semester practical exams and getting ready for the New Year’s Eve, I received a call from home and got to know that Mom was seriously ill. I rushed to Hospet in no time. I was shattered to see mom’s health, I some how felt that this is something serious and need to be taken utmost care and priority. Fate once written can never be changed; we were just left with the memories of a true woman – a true leader.

Life was a mess and the confusion was all around. Exams were near by and I damn cared for it until I realized that this time studies should be the top most priority in my list as my family wanted me to complete my graduation on time. Priorities in life suddenly changed as I had strong reason to prove. The same situation was repeated but this time with a greater loss, the incident had created a permanent vacuum in my life and I had to be much stronger than I was. I knew what the loss is and I decided to move on with a stronger heart. The results of the semester were satisfying and but still there is a regret why did I wait till the extreme to happen?

Sure, when something extreme happens to us, we learn. It may be within us or with the human race in general. But have you ever wondered what life would be like if you didn't have those experiences? Whether good or bad...I say that my experiences have made me stronger and have made me the person I am today.

Learning is continuous process but come on! How much character does one need? I'd gladly trade in my inner strength, self-confidence, and lessons learned for somebody who needs it.

“You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul.” – Swami Vivekananda

Thank you for your time,
Prasanna Muzumdar